PARASHAT CHAYEI SARA

 

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This week’s shiurim are sponsored by Ruchy Yudkowsky
in memory of Yehuda Yudkowsky z"l

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In honor of our new daughter Talia Jacquelyn Schanler.
We have benefited from much Torah taught from the VBM and Har Etzion

and hope our daughter will also be able to do so, when she grows up!

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Rivka

 

By Rav Amnon Bazak

 

 

A.        "The matter has Come from God"

 

Rivka, alone among the patriarchs and matriarchs, has the honor of a lengthy explanation in the Torah as to why and how she came to be among the founding pillars of the Israelite nation. The main narrative of our parasha (chapter 24) presents a merging of two levels of her selection. On the one hand, it is Avraham's servant who defines the special qualities required of a woman in order to be worthy of becoming Yitzchak's wife; on the other hand, it is clear that these qualities are simply the sign that God has selected her.

 

This assumption is shared by all the parties involved. From the outset, Avraham tells his servant that he will receive Divine assistance:

 

"The Lord God of the heavens, Who took me from my father's house and from the land of my birth, and Who spoke to me and Who swore to me, saying, 'To your descendants I shall give this land' – He will send His angel before you, so you can bring a wife for my son from there." (Bereishit 24:7)[1]

 

The servant himself also emphasizes more than once that the choice is in God's hands. For example:

 

(14) "And it shall be that the girl to whom I say, 'Let down your pitcher, I pray, that I may drink,' and she says, 'Drink – and I shall also water your camels' – it will be she whom You have shown for Your servant, for Yitzchak.”

 

(48) “So I bowed my head and prostrated myself before the Lord, and I blessed the Lord God of my master, Avraham, Who led me on the right path to take the daughter of my master's brother, for his son."

 

Ultimately, Rivka's family expresses the same feeling:

 

(50) Lavan and Betuel answered and said, “The matter has come from God; we cannot speak to you either bad or good.

 

(51) Behold, Rivka is before you – take her and go, and let her be a wife for your master's son, as God has spoken."

 

The parasha explains clearly why God chose Rivka. The quality of kindness that characterizes her is manifest in the criterion which the servant sets forth in his request, and it is clearly expressed in the selflessness and generosity with which she acts. At the same time, a review of the parasha reveals further qualities in Rivka that likewise explain her selection.

 

B.        Avraham vs. Rivka

 

At the beginning of the parasha, Avraham sends his servant to seek a wife for Yitzchak. He does not specify which qualities he seeks in a daughter-in-law, but from his request, "You shall not take a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites" (v.3) it seems that his wise servant[2] understands that she must have sterling moral traits, which are not to be found among the local women. With this in mind, the servant carries out his “experiment,” aimed at identifying a woman who is especially kindhearted.[3]

 

It is interesting to note that Rivka's trait of kindness parallels the description of Avraham's own trait of kindness. The servant asks of her, "Let me drink a little water, I pray you, from your pitcher" (24:17), while Avraham had told his guests, "Let a little water be taken, I pray you, that you may wash your feet".[4] Avraham speaks little but acts quickly to carry out much more than he promised:

 

Avraham hurried to the tent, to Sara, and said, “Prepare quickly three measures of find flour”… and Avraham ran to the herd and took a calf that was tender and good, and gave it to the young man, and he hurried to prepare it. (18:6-7)

 

Similarly, we read concerning Rivka:

 

She hurried to lower her pitcher… and she hurried to empty her pitcher into the trough, and she ran again to the well to draw water. (24:18-20)[5]

 

In other words, the text is indicating that in the realm of kindness, Rivka resembles the patriarch of the family – Avraham.[6]

 

However, the similarity between Rivka and Avraham is visible in other areas, too, which also contribute to the molding of her character. At the beginning of the parasha, Avraham asks of his servant, "Rather, go to my country and my birthplace" (24:4). When the servant recounts this to his hosts he adds,

 

“And my master made me swear, saying, 'You shall not take a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites in whose land I dwell. But you shall go to my father's house…’" (vv. 37-38)

 

These words, of course, hint to Avraham's first test:

 

"Go forth from your land and from your birthplace and from your father's house." (12:1)

 

Thus, we attain a better understanding of the difficult test facing Rivka, who is required to leave her family and go alone to a man she has never seen, and of the inner strength that is concealed behind her simple and courageous expression of agreement: "I shall go" (24:58).

 

Rivka's separation from her family is also somewhat reminiscent of the binding of Yitzchak. In both narratives, a complete severance is required between the father and his son or daughter. Avraham, who is commanded concerning a most extreme severance – to offer his son as a sacrifice – hurries to fulfill God's command: "Avraham arose early in the morning" (22:3). Lavan and Betuel are likewise required to sever themselves from Rivka. The text hints that the gold and silver that the servant had brought succeeded in drawing their hearts in the direction of his request ("And it was, when he saw the nose-ring and the bracelets upon his sister's hands" – 24:30);[7] nevertheless, they seek to delay the plan:

 

They arose in the morning and he said, “Send me away to my master.” But her brother and her mother said, “Let the girl remain with us for some days, or for ten; afterwards she shall go." (vv. 54-55)

 

But Rivka is ready to set off right away. She is therefore blessed by her family: "Your descendants shall inherit the gate of those who hate them" (v. 60) – recalling the blessing given to Avraham following the akeda: "And your descendants shall inherit the gate of those who hate them" (22:17).

 

Avraham lives in a pagan environment, and from within it he is chosen:

 

"Your fathers once dwelled on the other side of the river – Terach, the father of Avraham and the father of Nachor – and they served other gods. And I took your father, Avraham, from the other side of the river." (Yehoshua 24:2-3)

 

Rivka has grown up in exactly the same environment, with all its ills. Like Avraham, she too has succeeded in maintaining a path of righteousness and kindness, and when the appointed time comes, she too is ready to answer the call to go to God's land. The parallel with Avraham therefore also emphasizes the ability to develop a unique personality, separated from the pagan environment that is such a negative influence.[8]

 

This connection would seem to explain Rivka's behavior when she eventually meets Yitzchak:

 

(64) Rivka lifted her eyes and she saw Yitzchak, and she fell from the camel.

 

(65) And she said to the servant, “Who is this man walking in the field towards us?” And the servant said, “He is my master.” And she took her veil and covered herself."

 

What is the meaning of her "falling" from the camel? Rashi, Rashbam, and Ibn Ezra all suggest that this was a voluntary act, expressing her modesty in the face of Yitzchak. However, it would appear that the stage of deliberate action comes only afterwards, when Rivka takes the veil and covers herself. The fall would seem to be a spontaneous reaction to the very sight of Yitzchak. Throughout her life, the orientation of Rivka’s spirit and her inner morality have been foreign to her surroundings. Now, as she suddenly spies Yitzchak – someone who has grown up in Avraham's home, a home to which she truly belongs, at the root of her soul – she is seized by great emotion, and it is this which causes her to fall from the camel.

 

C.        "Drink, My Lord"

 

One further point arises from a close reading of the text. Upon reaching Aram Naharayim, Avraham's servant establishes the sign that he is waiting for as follows:

 

"And it shall be that the girl to whom I say, 'Let down your pitcher, I pray, that I may drink', and she says, 'Drink – and I shall also water your camels' – it will be she whom You have shown for Your servant, for Yitzchak." (v. 14)

 

He uses similar language to describe the sign to Rivka's family, when he tells them what transpired:

 

"When I came today to the stream I said… ‘Let [it be that] the girl who comes out to draw water, and I say to her, 'Let me drink a little water from your pitcher, I pray you', and she says to me, 'You drink, and I shall draw also for your camels' – let her be the woman whom God has shown for the son of my master." (vv. 42-44)

 

And indeed, he testifies, this is what happened:

 

"And behold, Rivka came out with her pitcher upon her shoulder, and she went down to the stream to draw water. And I said to her, 'Let me drink, I pray you." And she hurried to lower her pitcher from upon her and she said, 'Drink, and I shall water your camels, too.' So I drank, and she also watered the camels.'" (vv. 45-46)

 

However, in reality, what happened was slightly different:

 

The servant ran towards her and he said, “Let me taste a little water from your pitcher, I pray you.” And she said, “Drink, my lord” – and she hurried to lower her pitcher into her hand, and gave him to drink. And when she finished giving him to drink she said, “I shall draw water also for your camels, until they have finished drinking.” And she hurried to empty her pitcher into the trough, and she ran again to the well to draw water, and she drew for all of the camels. (vv. 17-20)

 

According to the servant, Rivka responded exactly as he expected her to: "Drink, and I shall water your camels also." However, as attested to in the text, Rivka divided her answer into two parts: first she told the servant to drink, and only when she had finished giving him to drink did she propose watering the camels. What is the significance of this?

 

This would seem to testify to yet another special quality in Rivka. Had she answered the servant as he expected her to – “Drink, and I shall also water your camels” – it would have been an implicit insult to the servant, being mentioned in the same breath as the beasts. Instead, Rivka showed him respect. Twenty-three times in the story, the devoted servant uses the word “master” (adon) in various forms in reference to Avraham. Only once in the story is it used to refer to anyone else, and that is here, where Rivka uses it to refer to the servant himself: "Drink, my lord (adoni)." The respect and delicacy with which she treats the servant leads her to first deal with his needs, and only afterwards to deal with his camels.[9]

 

In any event, the servant appears not to have noticed any of this, and when he describes Rivka's actions, he repeats what he had anticipated in advance, failing to note the small but significant change in the way Rivka treats him.

 

Translated by Kaeren Fish